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Should you walk away from work during your prime earning years, or stay on the job so you can leave a larger inheritance to a child who may not earn much money? One Reddit user is struggling with this exact dilemma.
The original poster and her husband are both 48 years old, have steady careers, and live modestly. Their simple lifestyle and strong income have helped them build a combined net worth of 8.1 million dollars. They are now considering retiring and relocating at the end of the year, but she admits to feeling guilty. Part of her wonders if she should keep working to give her son an even bigger financial head start.
So the big question remains: should she delay her dream of early retirement to grow her son’s inheritance, or should she step back, enjoy the life she has worked so hard for, and trust that her child can build his own path?
This post was updated on November 9, 2025 to clarify a safe withdrawal rate is based on multiple factors, as well as offer an objective perspective on financial support of a child.
According to her post, the OP has already gone above and beyond to set her son up for success. He is currently in college and will graduate with no student loans, plus enough money to pursue graduate school without taking on debt. She and her husband have also built him a stock account worth roughly 250,000 dollars, giving him an incredible financial foundation before he even begins his career.
Her husband believes they have done more than enough and that it is time for their son to stand on his own and build his own income. But the OP feels guilty about stepping back to enjoy life, especially because her son chose a field he loves even though it is not likely to lead to a high salary. She describes him as hardworking and committed, taking on jobs and internships while in school, yet she fears that he may still struggle financially in the future. Her instinct is to protect him from ever facing hardship, even if that means sacrificing her own plans.
The truth is that she has already provided far more financial support than most parents could dream of offering. By every objective measure, she has fully set her son up for adulthood with a debt free education and a six figure investment portfolio. But emotions do not always follow the math, and her worries about his future well-being are clearly affecting her ability to enjoy her own money. This is not simply a matter of meeting obligations, because she does not believe those obligations are finished.
That does not mean she has to delay early retirement. Instead, she can find a balance between stepping away from work and feeling confident that her son will be financially secure. With planning, communication, and the nest egg she has already built for him, she can allow herself to retire while still offering support in a way that feels meaningful and manageable.
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While the OP is fixated on leaving her son a larger inheritance, that is probably the wrong way to think about his long term financial security. If all goes well, she will live many decades, and by the time her son eventually receives an inheritance, he will likely be well into his own career and already responsible for supporting himself.
Instead of focusing on what she might leave him in 40 or 50 years, it makes more sense for the OP to consider how she can help him now. She can look for ways to provide support in the present while still protecting her ability to retire early and enjoy the life she has earned.
With a net worth of 8.1 million dollars, a diversified portfolio and a safe withdrawal rate should generate roughly 300,000 dollars a year in income. That estimate assumes the entire portfolio is invested and follows a withdrawal rate of around 3.7 percent, which many experts believe is a reasonable guideline today, though it varies with asset allocation, inflation, and retirement horizon. Because the OP and her husband describe themselves as having simple tastes and plan to leave their high-cost area, this income would likely give them a comfortable lifestyle with money to spare. She could gift her son a modest amount each year or save up to help him purchase a home when the time comes.
Of course, she has no obligation to do any of this. By all objective measures, she has already done far more than most parents. But if part of her joy in having wealth comes from helping a hardworking child who may not earn a high income, there is nothing wrong with that. She does not need to give up her retirement dreams. Instead, she can find a way to enjoy her financial freedom while still providing support in a way that feels right to her.
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